You made an excellent point about the Hollywood portrayal of how healing/closure looks like. It's so true that that is a myth, a rare case. Among the thousands of women who are healing from betrayal that I'm connected with, 0% of the betraying partners ever take responsibility. When it comes to parental abuse, it's also true, especially in cultures like mine, where the parents would "lose face" if they ever apologize to their children. So, what you said about healing starting from within is absolutely true. Reclaiming our sense of self and tapping into the inner resources with the help of a good therapist and support network is key, and it doesn't have to involve the perpetrator of abuse. Your client example is amazing and a good testiment to your thesis. Great article!
You’re welcome. Your ideas need to be heard by as many people as possible. I think there should be movies that portray the nuances of healing, to counter the fairytale/feel-good myths portrayed by Hollywood. We need a cultural shift!
Outstanding article. As a counselor of many years, and through my writing, I've witnessed and then worked to capture the feelings and intricacies of abuse. It is never, ever easy. Empathy, understanding, and the ability to listen and guide are important ingredients to helping the victim over the hurdle.
Such a beautifully written, powerful piece - thank you! I agree with you that closure comes from within. I never experienced the Hollywood version, other than playing it out in my head - and even that felt hollow.
Reading this article brought tears to my eyes. Thank you! As a childhood abuse survivor myself, I'm grateful for your perspectives and your advocacy. It would have been pointless to confront any of my abusers. The parents felt entirely justified, others were just insane. As you say, the power to heal is within survivors themselves. Always. The very big challenge in some cases is that it can be so hard to see that power after years of seeming helpless hopelessness. I went years wondering if anything I did helped at all. But finally I began to notice changes -- not necessarily "improvements," but a longer distance between anxiety attacks, for example. Or a familiar trigger not triggering me. I live for the little wins because big wins just aren't (yet) an option. It's nice to see people like you in this world. Thank you for sharing.
I’m so glad this has resonated with you. I only hope more will find the courage to begin the often challenging process of rebuilding their inner lives.🙏
You made an excellent point about the Hollywood portrayal of how healing/closure looks like. It's so true that that is a myth, a rare case. Among the thousands of women who are healing from betrayal that I'm connected with, 0% of the betraying partners ever take responsibility. When it comes to parental abuse, it's also true, especially in cultures like mine, where the parents would "lose face" if they ever apologize to their children. So, what you said about healing starting from within is absolutely true. Reclaiming our sense of self and tapping into the inner resources with the help of a good therapist and support network is key, and it doesn't have to involve the perpetrator of abuse. Your client example is amazing and a good testiment to your thesis. Great article!
Thank you Louisa.🙏 Your response means more to me than you’ll ever know.
You’re welcome. Your ideas need to be heard by as many people as possible. I think there should be movies that portray the nuances of healing, to counter the fairytale/feel-good myths portrayed by Hollywood. We need a cultural shift!
Outstanding article. As a counselor of many years, and through my writing, I've witnessed and then worked to capture the feelings and intricacies of abuse. It is never, ever easy. Empathy, understanding, and the ability to listen and guide are important ingredients to helping the victim over the hurdle.
Thank you for your kind observations. 🙏 It is hard work indeed, but the payoff is priceless.
Such a beautifully written, powerful piece - thank you! I agree with you that closure comes from within. I never experienced the Hollywood version, other than playing it out in my head - and even that felt hollow.
Reading this article brought tears to my eyes. Thank you! As a childhood abuse survivor myself, I'm grateful for your perspectives and your advocacy. It would have been pointless to confront any of my abusers. The parents felt entirely justified, others were just insane. As you say, the power to heal is within survivors themselves. Always. The very big challenge in some cases is that it can be so hard to see that power after years of seeming helpless hopelessness. I went years wondering if anything I did helped at all. But finally I began to notice changes -- not necessarily "improvements," but a longer distance between anxiety attacks, for example. Or a familiar trigger not triggering me. I live for the little wins because big wins just aren't (yet) an option. It's nice to see people like you in this world. Thank you for sharing.
I’m so glad this has resonated with you. I only hope more will find the courage to begin the often challenging process of rebuilding their inner lives.🙏
Me too!
Thank you for your kind words 🙏